This morning we were playing with the train set. The entire living room floor was covered in an intricate maze of multicoloured track, bumps, bridges and switches.
Then TB changes his mind.
Mummy, you tidy this up and I’ll carrying on playing with this (pointing to something else).
That kid’s got cheek!
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This week I’ve been training to be a first aider. I can bandage wounds, wounds with embedded objects, burst veins, head injuries and burns, I can even deal with a person whose intestines are hanging out, if this should ever happen in our non-eventful office! Yup, I can make most things look pretty, although not do a lot to actually sort them. It seems the answer in most cases is 999. As a good point, I actually passed the exam (not sure how I would’ve explained it to work if I didn’t).
Also finally managed to find a dress to wear to Y’s wedding. A bargain in Primark! And an indecently sized pair of shorts. Yes, they are already introducing thei summer wardrobe! Pretty much finished Christmas shopping, and even came home with a tree which Y promptly put up, despite the fact that it’s not even December yet. There’s just no reasoning with some people.
Yesterday morning, as I was leaving for work, TB came out of the kitchen carrying two crushed eggs in his hands.
“Mummy, I was just making eggs” he said.
He’d removed a box of 18 eggs from the fridge, taken out half of them, and they were lying in a mess of broken shell across the cooker, worktop and floor.
The things the young will do for a bit of scrambled egg!
And so, to the unnamed person in hiding that thought it would be a smart idea to load the entire database onto disk and send it off with a courier, why? Why did you really have to be so stupid?
Of course it's almost expected from the government really.
What you don't expect is for your employer to keep your personal details in a safe so insecure that when they're broken into, the thief can make off with enough details to quite easily and thoroughly 'become' each member of staff. That's right. Our company's northern office was broken into last night,and the culprit made off with the entire staff's personal data.
To say I'm not feeling at my most secure this evening would be a slight understatement.
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Yesterday was a challenge.
I went to the doctors to get some more meds and took the opportunity to explain exactly how much I was struggling with my eating at the moment. I guess I was expecting the doctor to come up with some idea I'd not thought of yet, some sort of cure, anything. Instead, he came up with nothing I hadn't tried already and couldn't seem to understand my frustration that these things didn't work or couldn't practicably be carried off.
It also appears that he's leaving at the end of the month. I asked who I should look to for a replacement and he only page that all of the doctors at the surgery were perfectly nice and understanding. All I could think of was the first doctor I saw there, whose only suggestion was to 'pull [myself] together'.
Needless to say, by the time I left I was feeling thouroughly demoralised and upset.
I didn't want to go to OA after all that, I didn't have the energy for it.
Last night's topic was acceptance. It's so frustrating the way people make acceptance seem so easy. But I have trouble with acceptance.
To me, actually being able to accept has a lot to do with being able to give things over to your higher power, relinquishing control of yours actions, and more especially your emotions, to something or someone greater than yourself.
But what happens when you and your higher power are having issues and you find that you just can't give over that control. What happens when that first step of 12 depend on the relationship between you and your higher power and the two me you just can't pull it together?
Industrial Magic: Women of the Otherworld by Kelley Armstrong
