Archive for the ‘Daily Life’ Category

My name’s Vic and I have a confession to make: I’m a bad blogger.

I started blogging when a comment system was something you signed up for at Haloscan and the idea of community was a few bloggers leaving you the odd comment now and then.  Blogging wasn’t backed up by forums and social media and there certainly wasn’t the obsession with stats that there is now. 

I spent over a year letting my blogging habit have free reign and pursuing it with vigour.  A job that gave me little to do each day left me with ample time to read my blogroll which held the regular musings of over 200 different people.  Little Mister came along and I had to cut back somewhat but I still found a way to combine blogging with family. 

Then I returned to work.  I looked forward to expanding my blogroll once more, to finding out about all the new writers that were appearing amongst UK parent bloggers and spending some much needed time on my own blog.

But things don’t always work out the way you plan.

Through unintended but perfect timing I’ve ended up in a role I love, one that may even see me stop floating in the near future and settle down in a permanent position.  What it doesn’t leave is time for blogging.  I’m lucky if I can manage to refresh twitter four times in a day.  Posts are something I write on the train and copy and paste from Word docs to wordpress.  My blogroll remains largely untouched.

I’m trying to read your blogs.  In rare spare moments I open up greader and feel so overwhelmed by the treble or quadruple figures that I mark most posts as read.  If I see a link on twitter I’ll click on it and maybe even try to comment.  It seems though that the blogging gods are conspiring against me.  I have an outdated version of IE at work with no option to upgrade or download another browser.  I can’t view anything with Flash and disqus doesn’t work.  Every time a page with disqus comments on loads I get an error message and there goes my blog reading. 

The 3G (or even Edge or GPRS) connection on my route to work is so patchy that I’ve given up trying to read blogs on my phone and I’ve come to the conclusion that a mobile broadband modem would be of little use.  My time at home is limited to three hours in the evening when I get the boys into bed, eat and sort my things for the following day at work.  I wouldn’t have a spare hand to type a web address in a browser if I tried. 

I need a system.  I’ve categorised the blogs in my reader but I need to do more.  I can’t cull, the idea alone breaks my heart.  I’ll have to rank in order of importance.  Know that if I don’t make it to your blog to comment it’s not that I don’t care – I do – but I just haven’t figured out how to balance yet.

So what do I do?

(Otherwise known as ‘how the hell do I explain BLW to my Nan?’)

Most Sundays we have dinner at the mother’s.  It’s a bit of a tradition really; as kids we always went to Nan’s for lunch and in the absence of enough place for us all to sit at their new house, we all head to the mother’s instead.  Usually we eat a roast dinner – even in the merciless heat of the summer – except when the sister complains that we always eat a roast.  Then the mother cooks something different and we all complain we wanted a roast – we only do it to needle the sister.

This Sunday was roast chicken.  As the mother served I popped a few bits on a plate for Li’l Mister; a potato; two carrot sticks; some chicken and some runner beans.  I decided red cabbage* was probably not safe in the hands of a seven month old.  The mother reckoned I was giving him a lot of food.  She was possibly right, but I knew what I was doing.

We sat down to eat and by the end of the meal, Li’l Mister had fed himself and probably only 10% of what I’d given was left.  I would say on his plate but we’d given up on that idea only moments after we’d sat down.  The leftovers were on the highchair tray, down his front, wedged along the sides of the cushion.  Surprisingly enough, very little had actually made it to the floor.  Yup, this is what BLW is all about.

The next day the boys and I popped over to Nan’s.  She asked when I’d start feeding Li’l Mister with a spoon.  I explained that we did sometimes; he devours porridge and will quite happily eat purees or chopped foods from a spoon.  But when will you start totally spoon feeding, she asked.  So you know how much he’s eating.

Knowing how much the kid is eating is not a problem.  We all saw how much food he wolfed down on Sunday at dinner.  Much like his parents and his older brother, knowing how to stop him eating would be more of an issue.  The boy likes his food.  Regardless of whether he’s being spoon-fed or feeding himself, he always seems to be getting enough to eat; he complains loudly if he doesn’t.  And you only have to look at him to know he’s not starving: he’s a big boy, already at the extent of his six to nine month clothes.

So I tried to explain that he was doing ok, that total spoon feeding wasn’t necessary.  I’m not entirely convinced I’ve turned my Nan into a BLW champion, but she now, at least, understands that it’s all ok.

Have you had BLW battles with your family?

*Yes, we were eating red cabbage in August.  It was frozen, left over from Christmas.  Quite possibly Christmas Eve 2008 when the mother asked me to buy red cabbage as the local supermarket had run out.  She didn’t say how many she needed so I bought three, just in case.  I swear we’re still eating that same cabbage.  The family never let me forget it either.

Despite much of my complaining, there are definite advantages to working out of the home all week.  I change a pooey nappy on average once every two to three weeks, I’m not often the one deliberating over what to feed the kids and having to clean up afterwards, I don’t have to deal with many of the nap time battles.

But I do miss the simple things, like deciding on the spur of the moment to take a quick walk down to the park.  So that’s what we did today whilst the husband nicked off to take photos and film for his new documentary.

There’s a whole load of photos if you follow the link; you might even find a Li’l Mister A video here.

I’m all for public service, so whilst everyone else was tucking into the Nutella during last Thursday’s Nutella Brekkie at Legoland, I was busy filming what Nutella’s three expert guests had to say.  Seeing as the milk content meant I couldn’t eat Nutella myself, I figured it was only fair that I made everyone else suffer and get them on camera.

And now for a little nutritional information*.  It seems that Nutella is a better option than butter and jam on your toast!  Something I’d never actually considered before.  It’s also not chocolate – the cocoa content is too low – so you can eat Nutella without guilt.

^{*Info taken from a variety of random internet sites and the backs of packs in our cupboard. Please don’t rely on its accuracy.}

Cybermummy brought the blogging world to life.  Despite any criticisms bloggers may have had, we all seem to agree on that point.  After the bitching and nastiness of the previous weeks everyone seemed to come together and get along; there was a real sense of friendship amongst us.

But no sooner than we had all gotten back behind our computers the bitchiness was back.  Some of us who had spent that day being nice to everyone were back to sniping and back-stabbing.  Whilst most bloggers are fab people, and grown-ups too, the playground mentality has clearly stuck.  When we’re together we all get along.  The moment someone’s back is turned they’re no longer a friend.

I wrote that, amongst other things in the weeks following Cybermummy but never managed to finish it into a blog post.  Now I need to because, after this weekend especially, I feel the need to say my bit.

With a few small exceptions I’ve had enough of bloggers.  I’ve had enough of the infighting, the bitching and the bullying.  I’ve had enough of reading posts about quitting and others about begging bloggers to carry on.  There’s over seven hundred of us listed for the Tots alone.  Why is it so difficult to stick to your corner and avoid those people who you don’t get along with?

I can cope with the bitching behind closed doors; we all do it, of that I’m sure, but there’s little need for it to spill into public forum.  It wouldn’t surprise me to find out that there are bloggers out there who bitch about me behind my back – I don’t consider myself a particularly likable person at times – and you know what, I really couldn’t give a shit.  I’m not expecting those people to hang around if you don’t like what I’ve got to say.  There are people who probably consider me a whore for doing sponsored posts and reviewing so many products that I’ve had to create a breakaway review blog just to stop boring readers.  So what?  At least I’m not whoring my body (and I’m not suggesting that any particular bloggers may be, although I bet it would make for an interesting read).

My issue is that there are a number of bloggers out there who seem incapable of walking away from controversy.  In fact, they not only invite it but seem to gravitate towards it.  You wouldn’t chase after a bully in the playground so why do we chase after trouble on our blogs?

In school I never had to worry about who liked who, who could stay in the same room and who not to invite to a party for fear of upsetting someone else.  We were all grown up enough, even in our young teenage years, to deal.  The other day we had a barbecue and we invited bloggers.  Some of the guest list was easy but it got to the point where we were saying we can’t invite X because she won’t stay in the same room with Y.

If you don’t see me around other blogs too much in the next week it’s because I’ve had enough.  If you genuinely need sympathy over a blogging situation then I apologise in advance – you won’t be getting it – you have other bloggers to blame.  My heart has become hardened.  Maybe by the time I feel like getting back into other blogs everyone will have learnt to get along.

Now bring on the lynch mobs.  I’m sure I’ve upset someone in the past few minutes.